The Work: Creating Change
Through inexperience we have the opportunity to make choices with little to no knowledge of the outcome — these choices can result in mistakes, but they also leave room for sparks of genius. As we continue to practice a skill or craft, we refine our approach. We miscalculate less often. We continue to do what works and we discard what doesn’t.
Overtime, we develop rules that dictate our behavior and actions. If A, then B. These rules allow us to feel confident, knowing what to do even when the situation we’re encountering is new.
Even more significant than learning what someone knows, is to learn how and why they came to that conclusion. Here within “the work” we’ll discover the rules that experts in the fitness and wellness space have developed as they share how they arrived.
RULES FOR CREATING CHANGE
1. SETTING CLEAR GOALS
You can’t get anywhere if you don’t know where you’re headed. The first and most important step of creating lasting change for yourself is to get clear on what it is you’re looking for.
One of my favorite ways to go about doing this is to imagine my ideal life in the near future, down to every detail. What would my space look like, my week, what work would I be doing, who would I be surrounded with? Get as detailed as you can — What time would you wake up each morning? What would your commute to work look like?
Being as specific as possible in this activity will help you discover what is really important to you and your experience, then you will more easily know what goals you have to set to get yourself there.
*An exercise I like to lean on if I’m feeling overwhelmed by the things I have to do or the goals I’m looking to achieve (which often happens when my mind is racing right before bed) is a Magic-Wand List — I think I came up with this, but I wouldn’t be surprised if this concept is out there.
Magic-Wand List:
I take out a notebook, flip to a blank page and I write down every single thing I want to have, to accomplish, to be completed, to do; if I had a magic wand — meaning, there are no barriers, blocks, or reasons why what I want can’t happen.
Each time I do this exercise, I’m surprised at the length of the list. I’ve never filled up an entire page — I usually run out of entries around 10 or 12. Recognizing this allows me to observe that there isn’t actually THAT much that has to be done when I’m feeling overwhelmed.
2. FINDING YOUR DEEPEST WHY
Now that you’ve set your goals, it’s time to get honest with yourself about WHY you want the things on your list. This can often be a challenge because it can be difficult to discern and accept the things we really want.
Say one of your goals is to get a higher paying job. Great, next what you’re going to do is ask yourself why you want that and what you’ll get once you have that (higher paying job). Maybe you want a bigger apartment or more money to spend going out with friends, or once you get a promotion you’ll be seen as successful in your parents’ eyes. Keep going until you get to the deepest, most emotionally charged reason behind each of your goals.
3. CONNECTING (AND RECONNECTING) TO PURPOSE
Here you’ll assess whether or not your original goal is aligned with the deepest reasoning of why you’re looking to achieve it.
Using the same example as above, let’s say what you’re really seeking through getting a higher paying job is the approval of your parents. Since there are variables (your parents’ reaction) in your purpose, you’re not setting yourself up for success by going after this goal.
Instead, you could consider choosing a new goal all together in order to find a way to connect with and gain the approval of your parents — sometimes just a vulnerable conversation will do. This will save you the time, effort, and energy of getting the higher paying job, while you’re still getting what you really wanted.
Alternatively, you can reframe your deeper purpose, conditioning yourself for what is realistic to be had once your goal is achieved. It would make sense that you could afford a bigger apartment once you increase your income, but this method allows you to determine whether or not this is worth it for you in the time, effort, and energy you’re about to exchange in order to get a higher paying job.
listen to episode 004 | The Origins of My Career + The Podcast with Lauren Schramm
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